Answer These Morality Questions and We'll Guess What Unusual Job You’d Be Perfect For

By: Zoe Samuel

6 Min Quiz

Image: Buena Vista Images/DigitalVision/Getty Images

About This Quiz

The world is full of strange jobs, many of them so odd that you may not even believe they exist! Just about every situation has a professional who can step in and get paid to do something. Don't believe us? Try this: if you feel a general sense of aimlessness, there's someone who you can hire to help out: a life coach. Do you want to win at tiddlywinks? There are professional tiddlywinks players who can be hired to coach you to perfection.

The question remains, which of these strange jobs is right for you? Most of them involve skills anyone could learn, given the time and determination, but there is still one element, one x-factor that will determine which of these jobs is right for you. That x-factor: morality. Morality is about a lot more than the black and white ideas of good and evil, it's a framework, it's the "strength of one's stomach" and it's a guide that will tell us which jobs you could handle, and even enjoy, and which jobs will be very wrong for you.

We assembled a test of your morality. It contains a variety of questions on a host of subjects, all of which are intended to tease out a 3D map of your moral landscape. With this, we can assign you a job, so take the quiz ... and be honest!

Trolley switch dilemma time: what should you do, pull a switch that will only result in one person getting hurt, or let three people get hurt?

Definitely don't pull the switch!

I probably wouldn't pull the switch.
Pull the switch. It's the right choice.

I don't think I could resist pulling the switch.

If you take something that someone didn't know was theirs and that there was no record of, is it a bad thing?

Usually.

Not at all.
Yes, always.

Generally no. Possession is 9/10ths of the law.

How bad is it if someone doesn't give up their seat on public transit to an elderly person?

It's just rude, not immoral.

It may be fine. They could have an invisible disability.
It's totally messed up.

It's bad, but on the scale of things, not too bad.

You're hosting a black tie party and a guest shows up dressed inappropriately. What should you do?

Tell them to hurry home and get the right outfit.

Loan them a couple items, and ask other guests to loan them whatever else they need to complete the outfit.
Tell them they can't attend the party.

Let them in without the right outfit.

You're at a friend's wedding, when you see the person marrying your friend flirting with someone inappropriate. What do you do?

Go to the intended spouse and tell them to straighten out.

Go to the inappropriate person and tell them to tell the friend.
Tell the friend yourself.

Say nothing.

You see an armored car lose a bag of cash. No one else is there. The car drove off, but you know the company name. What do you do?

Take it, but pay it forward.

Don't take it! Say nothing!
Take it, and call the police, and then the armored car company to return it and keep a record of your good deed.

Don't touch it. Call the cops.

You accidentally hit someone with your car, but it turns out that that person is an infamous killer. Are you a hero or what?

I'm no hero. I got lucky when I did a bad thing.

I'm totally a hero.
I am both a hero and a villain.

I'm neither a hero or a villain.

Your friend's unfriendly elderly relative is nearing the end and your friend is spending a lot of time with them. You learn that the relative is wealthy and has no kids. What do you think of your friend?

They're doing a nice thing, full stop.

They're making an old person feel good, which is good even if they're doing it for bad reasons.
They're neither good nor bad.

They're a jerk.

You invite 4 friends for dinner. 3 show up, and say they're allergic to your chip dip. Number 4 shows up an hour late without an apology and digs into the dip. Is it wrong for you to double dip?

Yes. It's always gross.

I see nothing wrong with it.
It's kinda okay.

It's a little wrong, but not very wrong.

Which of these is the best apology for hurting someone's feelings by saying X?

I'm sorry I hurt your feelings by saying X.

I'm sorry that my saying X hurt your feelings.
I'm sorry that your feelings got hurt by my saying X.

I'm sorry that I said X and your feelings were hurt.

How wrong is it for someone to video a crime on their phone when they could easily step in and stop it?

It's a little wrong.

It's very wrong.
It's totally wrong.

It's not at all wrong.

Your friend has an aspect of their appearance they can't see that looks bad, but there's no way to fix it. Do you tell them?

No. Absolutely not.

Probably not.
Definitely. Tell them.

I'd probably tell them. They have a right to know.

A bedridden friend hours from the end asks you if you plan to name a child for them. You don't. What do you say?

Probably say no.

Probably say yes.
Definitely say no.

Say yes, without hesitation.

Should children be told to believe in fairy tales like Santa Claus and the Easter Bunny?

Yes, but not by me.

Absolutely! They'll find out they're lies eventually.
I don't know. It seems like it would establish a harmful pattern.

No, absolutely not.

You find out that a polite greeting you initiated to someone is actually a terrible insult in their culture. What do you do?

Tell someone else what to do, then send them to greet the person, and apologize on your behalf.

Find out how to say that you are sorry in their culture, and do that, then walk away.
Do nothing. It's not your fault.

Apologize immediately.

Is it wrong to borrow from Peter to pay Paul?

Of course it is.

It's not wrong but it's not a good idea.
It's fine, but only up to a point. Then it is very very wrong.

It's bad, but not wrong.

Your eccentric friend believes a food ingredient is bad for them and they refuse to eat it. This "allergy" is imaginary. You accidentally serve it to them in food you just cooked, but they don't know. What should you do?

Say nothing.

Tell them the ingredient was in your kitchen earlier and might have gotten into the food.
Casually mention it's in there, and mock their craziness.

Mention it, but pretend you don't know about their thing about the ingredient.

While a guest in someone's home, you accidentally break a fancy crystal glass. What do you do?

Fix it! Quick!

Hide it! Quick!
Pay for it. Quick!

Offer a bottle of wine to the host to compensate them.

You find out that the idea that helped a beloved friend advance their career was taken from you without permission. What should your friend do?

They should tell me.

They should say nothing, if they don't know I know.
They should pay me back in kind.

They should confess that it wasn't their idea, not to me, but to our boss.

Your neighbor has stolen your mail and destroyed it several times, but you can't prove anything. What should you do?

Confront them.

Glue their mailbox shut.
Change the numbers on their mailbox so they don't get any mail.

Set up a sting.

You just realized you have a library book you borrowed more than 20 years ago. What should you do about it?

Buy a newer edition for the library.

Write about it in your blog.
Return it, with late fees.

Return it with apologies and hope you don't get charged late fees.

Your niece or nephew asks you to explain how storks get into hospitals to deliver babies. How do you respond?

Refuse to even entertain the question.

Tell them something so crazy, they don't believe it.
Tell them to ask their parents.

Tell them that it's all a lie, and lay out the truth about reproduction.

Four people are waiting in a room: a 6 year old, a 22 year old, a 40 year old, and a 60 year old. Who should be given the one seat?

The 22 year old

The 40 year old
The child

The 60 year old

Your child gets into trouble for punching a kid at school. They tell you that the other kid tried to cut them, but there's no evidence. What would you do?

Demand the other kid be expelled.

Sue the school for letting the other kid bring a knife to school.
Go to the parents of the other kid and share the accusation with them.

Take this to the school and demand they look into it.

You see a woman being emotionally abused by her boyfriend in a public place. He says he's going to use the bathroom and then take her home. What do you do?

Call the police

Offer an escape
Confront the guy

Make a scene

You just figured out that your Toyota was keyed by the guy at work who drives the Porsche. What is the appropriate action?

Confront them about it.

Pull a mean prank on them.
Key their car.

Bring the proof to your employer.

You have two cousins who desperately need a kidney transplant and you are the only donor match. How do you choose which to give a kidney?

Give it to the healthier one who has a better shot at survival.

Give it to the less healthy one who needs it more.
Give it to the one you like best

Give it to the one you like least.

You mistakenly ate your very mean coworker's sandwich, and you know they'll be disproportionately mean about it. You really thought it was yours! What should you do?

Gaslight them.

Pretend ignorance.
Leave cash for them to get a new one.

Buy them a replacement, anonymously.

Your work friend is on the brink of being fired. You see them accidentally knock the bumper off the boss's vintage Mercedes as they drive home. The next day, the boss demands to know who did it or they will fire your whole team. What do you do?

Claim you did it, to save the team and your friend.

Say you might have done it and not noticed.
Turn in your friend.

Say it was your friend but mount a strong defense of them.

You see a man rob an ATM, but then he immediately gives the money to a poor family. What do you do?

Nothing.

Tell him you're hard up and could use some money.
Call the cops.

Ask him why he did it.

5 Minute Quiz 5 Min

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